I have been extremely sensitive since I was really young - 5 years old. I was a verbally, physically and sexually abused kid. Home was the most dangerous place for me. I learned not to trust anyone including my relatives. It had left me traumatized and I didn't even know it. I would ghost anyone - employers, friends, relatives, lovers. In arguments, I would shut down, pretend they don't exist, or runaway from home. Any slight raise of voice, criticism, disagreement, nasty comment, misunderstanding would send me ghosting someone.
I didn't know why I'd do it. After 39 years, I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 with psychotic symptoms, and generalized anxiety disorder. I still don't know why I ghost people but I feel like once I ghost, I feel this numb feeling that people I care about don't love me as much as I love them when they can just hurt me so easily by saying mean things, not making time, not listening, not speaking nicely, etc. I just was afraid of confrontation because I realized I can't control my own emotions when I'm upset. I realized I get angry rarely but when I do, it's very explosive to the point that the relationship would be irreparable on my end. I'm just overall not a very forgive and forget type of person. It's for me the feeling of betrayal - whether a close friend promising to be at my birthday party and doesn't do it, etc. I simply cant take it. I work with a psychiatrist and psychologist to get help. I also have medications.